I think Satan knows when we have resolve and he does his best to trip us up. Tear us down. As I do my best to study what the Bible says about financial management and I’ve worked on my prayer life, I’ve drawn closer to God and I’ve opened my heart for a better understanding of how to manage what God has bestowed on my family. And then worry and doubt and impatience – which were always swirling beneath the surface – started seeping out. I have to bat down the darkness around every turn.
I’ve vaguely mentioned an opportunity that we’ve been praying over. Well, yesterday my impatience was a constant suck on my energy. When I had the Oprah-style aha! moment, I was able to settle my soul and apologize to God for not trusting in His timing and His way on the matter. I know He will provide – I just want Him to do it right.now.
And it occurs to me that this impatience is tangled deep in the roots of our financial struggles. I want a new couch right.now. I want a new outfit right.now. I want new dishes right.now. We are solidly members of the impulse-buying club, but we are also members of the can’t-deny-myself-anything club and the I-want-what-I-want-when-I-want-it club.
I’m glad to recognize these shortcomings, these struggles. Now I can focus energy and prayer into overcoming these challenges and I know where Satan is most likely to focus his energy, too!!