In yesterday’s post I said I was so excited about paying off our debts that it’s keeping me up nights. It’s actually all-consuming. Here’s how my day progressed yesterday:
- Wake up, pat myself on back for having a budget that kinda, sorta works.
- Realize for the 100th time that we need to find more money somewhere, somehow for necessities like food, gas, and medical issues… Oh and to put something toward debts.
- Pack diaper bag to take youngest daughter for meet-and-greet session at her daycare that she will start on Friday. Thank my lucky stars that I used cloth diapers with our oldest child and that I don’t have to buy any kind of diaper this time around.
- Coordinate with my birth center for a shot at a “very” part time job opening. I might be able to make $50 a month to put toward debt without missing out on too much at home.
- Get to daycare and find out that cloth diapers have recently been banned.
- Choke back tears.
- Realize I now have to come up with $30 extra in a budget that was already short to cover disposable diapers.
- Hope that my full-time gig will allow me to take “very” part time job, because I’m going to have to do it to cover diapers.
- Have husband remind me that my full-time gig already wants me to work unpaid overtime, which I’m resisting, and is unlikely to give permission for a part-time gig unless I’m doing that overtime, too.
- Hate my husband for being right.
- Realize I could stop packing my daughter’s lunch for preschool. Yes, I’d rather her eat my vegan fare than the carnivorous fast-food crap that is served, but I could probably save $30 a week if I didn’t have principles.
- Darn my principles.
- Negotiate with myself that she’s not really vegan, anyway. She had “dead deer” and loved it “even though it’s mommy misses it and it’s so sad”.
- Remind myself I have principles. But darn them anyway.
- Realize that I have a bonus coming my way in January if I can manage to not to tick off my employer and keep my job. It will cover one of our three small loans.
And then noon rolled around…